baby story

I've kept the first part of my pregnancy a big secret to many people. Again, I apologize for keeping it but I'm hoping that many of you would understand the reason why.

Finding out: I was suppose to have my monthly period Dec 16. It was already Dec. 25 and I still don't have my period. So Panda went to the drug store to buy me those tests. To be quite honest, I was pretty calm about it because I was pretty sure that my monthly cycle just went berserk because of the stress I'm dealing with at school. So I did the test and to my surprise, its positive!!! Hyperventilated inside the bathroom because I couldn't believe it. I asked well, if memory serves it was more like demanded Panda to buy me another because I claimed that the test is defective. So I did the test again, and viola! its still positive...anu naman laban ko sa 2 p.t na nagsabi positive diba???

Deciding: One thing I am very proud of is that I accepted my situation whole heartedly. Abortion never came across my mind. I would never do anything to hurt my baby. I talked to Panda, and I told him I want to keep the baby. I was the one who decided to keep the baby a secret because I'm still in school. Dangerous as it was, I decided to continue my schooling. Half of the semester to go and then graduate na ako so why waste it?

First Trimester Experience: whoever said that being pregnant is easy, you're wrong! so totally wrong. Having morning sickness...rather whole day sickness was never easy. Having the feeling of wanting to throw up everytime I smell pasta, meat that is being cooked, raw garlic, raw onion, sauteed garlic and onions are the worst. I am one of the number one fans of pasta, but during my first tri, I am one of the number one haters of pasta. I don't like eating meat, chicken i can stand but not beef or sometimes pork. I can eat three small pieces but beyond that no more. I don't eat okras, but because of pregnancy, i eat them like they are one of the best things in the world. I prefer eating veggies. In school, I can eat pork sinigang everyday since its the only food that I can stand.

I also experienced panic. There was one night that I had spotting. According to the internet spotting is usually okay, but if it is blood...that's a big oh no! yes, it was blood spotting...I panicked because it was in the middle of the night, Panda's nowhere near me and my parents doesn't know about me being pregnant. So how? I went to bed worrying about my baby. The next day, I had my check up. Thank goodness my baby was okay. According to the OB it was threatened abortion. She asked what I was doing in life so I told her I'm a graduating student and I have no intentions of discontinuing my studies...so she made me do the "aggressive method" which is to take duvadilan (pangpakapit) 3x a day for 1 week. Not pretty I tell you. I had pimples sprouting and I wasn't able to do anything about it since pimple medicine is a big no no...

Second Trimester Experience

Fourth Month: I can feel my baby moving! hahahaha! its kicking na nga e. The baby is super active during night time. No more morning sickness!! I can eat pasta, but I still prefer veggies over meat. I still don't like the smell of garlic and onions and meat that is being cooked. I also experienced a very bad headache...and to my dismay, I can't even drink biogesic...so I had to do the pahid of menthol method. Pregnancy really makes you do crazy things. I am one of those people who hated the feeling of applying menthol on my body and then here i am putting this chinese menthol thing on my forehead. I love ripe mangoes. I am saddened by the news that I can no longer enjoy eating candies and chocolates (oh horror!!!) candies, I can live without, but chocolates??? grrr...it was one of my cravings and I'm not allowed to eat it thanks to my ancestral family (mother side) for the genes of diabetes.

I'm already counting the days of my next check up because hopefully, we would be able to see the gender of the baby na. I've been looking out for baby names. Recently, I have downloaded a list of all the things I'll be needing to prepare before my baby comes...ANG DAMI! and I haven't even started buying any!!! hai, panic mode nanaman ako nyan later...but I guess minimal panic mode because I enjoy shopping. I just hope my feet wouldn't let me down.

rudeness and ondoy... :))

how very rude of you two to talk about me... :)) see, for one thing i think im entirely correct about you people being such gossipers. Hai, wala naman ako magagawa dun kung ganyan kayo talaga. Past is past. I have moved on. Why? kasi he's not the only friend i have on this entire planet. Madami pa akong friends who are much worth my time than him. I have learned my lesson the hard way. Not all "friends" are "friends" for life. So I guess that's that.

Para sa inyong dalawa: Stop being like old ladies who do nothing but gossip. You have spare time? do something productive like reading books to increase your comprehension skills.

Enough na nga about that. News flash!!! I just got home yesterday!!! hahahaha! i spent the night in panda's house. Grabe yung typhoon...it got aurora flooded...well its not like aurora doesn't flood like hell...pero 3rd street nagflood like hell!!! hehehehe...napaka-i dunno experience. I cant find words that would fit to describe this experience. This is the first time I fought with my mom about my safety ad I ended up being right. Hell naman kasi, ang hard headed ng mom ko. Sabi ngang lahat ng way home is already flooded and gusto pa niya mag commute ako pauwi. Thank God I didnt follow her lead about me getting on the lrt to vmapa dahil nun time na i was arguing with her, the road papuntang lrt station v mapa was already unpassable by cars. Kamusta naman yun edi nastranded pa ako sa lrt station kung sumunod ako sakanya. naiinis ako kasi she wants me na lumusob sa baha just to find a way home and to give my dad a peace of mind. (my dad doesn't stop pacing around kapag wala pa kami lahat sa bahay) hindi man lang niya naisip na hindi din magkakaroon ng peace of mind ang dad ko kapag ako nastranded mag isa sa lrt station and wala din sila peace of mind if i get so unlucky...magkasakit pa ako...she very well knows that my immune system is weak. Ma-ambunan lang ako magkakasakit na ako for a week. I also can't afford that kasi kawawa naman si Grace sa thesis namin and malapit na finals!!!!

For me, this is the second worst typhoon that ever struck the country. I pray for those people out there who are still stuck on the roof of their houses that they will be rescued asap. I also pray for their health, not only those who are still waiting to be rescued but also for those who are in the evacuation centers. I also pray for the rescuers that they would still have the courage and strength to continue their job in rescuing others because a lot of people's lives rest in their hands.

swimming jitters

tomorrow's the big day!!!! grabe, can't get over it...im nervous for tomorrow..why? first, training days were not enough..I know i know, im the team captain and i was supposed to be the one scheduling the trainings. But hey, i can't help it..medyo minalas kami ngayun because of the weather. A lot of our training days were cancelled because of the bad weather. As the team captain, i am placed with a heavy burden of making sure the team can defend the championship title and at the same time my team mates' safety. which will i choose? honestly, everytime i cancel trainings a lot of pros and cons goes through my head...but still my team mates' safety should go first. To my team mates who are reading this right now, first, i would like to apologize kung nakulangan kayo sa trainings. I am so sorry, pero sana maintindihan niyo...as much as i love the psych organization, love ko din kayo as much and i'm not about to risk your safety over a defending title. To my organizarion mates, sana maintindihan niyo yung lugar ko...mahirap pumili, but i have to. second: I have my monthlies!!!! sobrang malas talaga!!!! i know monthilies are supposedly "suppose" to stop when you get in the water, but hey...that doesn't make the monthlies go away! sometimes kahit nasa water ka may lumalabas pa din.

To My Team Mates:
Guys, we can do this...its normal na kabahan tayo and all those negative thoughts, but we can push those aside and I believe we can still defend our title. Guys, especially to the newcomers, nakita ko kayo ever since nagsimula ang trainings. I can say na you guys improved a lot and that alone makes me proud of you guys. Manalo matalo, it wouldn't change the fact that I'm still proud of you guys. Madami naging pasaway and madaming hardships akong dinaanan as the team captain pero I can say that those hardships are well worth it. I am truly happy that I spent a lot of time with you guys kahit training hours lang. I got to know the newcomers and the old comers more deeply.

Ally: alam ko na most of the hardship on this competition will be on your part kasi madami kang lalanguyin and nag cheering practice ka pa..in addition, may sakit ka pa...ally, you can do this...wag ka mag alala dahil coach is there to put pressure on us... :)) love you ally

baby skyie: you can do this. I know how it feels na this is your first time to compete for the organization. Don't you worry my baby skyie, kapag nasa tubig ka, i will cheer for you. Malaki ang improvement mo skyie and im so happy with those improvements. Iam proud of you my baby skyie...love you skyie... :D

Pau: at some point we started on the wrong side of the bed. But i can assure you that i did not hold that incident against you. I believe in second chances and I gave you one. Seriously? natuwa ako sayo. After that incident, you shaped up. I am happy that I gave you that second chance. You didn't let me down my dear. I am proud of you. You always look on the positive side of every training days. Sana lagi kang ganyan. Love you Pau

Nory: hai ang puso ko...next time ha..you know what i'm talking about. First, sorry kung hindi mo na feel that I could be trusted with that vital information. Pero sana sinabi mo agad. Anyways, Nory, I saw a big improvement sayo. Although you still need to be trainied a little bit, pero with a situation like yours, your efforts to be with us in defending the title and you being with us every training days makes me happy and proud. basta Nory, whatever happens sa pool, i'm still here for you kahit na kelangan pa kitang saluhin sa pool..promise I'll still do that kahit competition... :) Love you Nory

Mel: My right hand...hahahaha! thank you for re-joining the team... :D im soooo happy that you get to be with us on this last swimming days of well...both of our college life (kasi graduating na tayo) thank you for giving me the oppurtunity to get to know you and to ba closer to you. Honestly, kung hindi ako siguro nagjoin ng swim team nung second year I wouldn't get the chance to know you better and to be close to you. Thank you for being there and helping me out whenever you can. Love you Mel.

To the whole swim team: I love you guys. You made this last swim in my college years a truly memorable one. I've once made a promise na kapag ako naging team captain all of you will be taken care of, walang maleleft out and all of you will be a part of my life. Sana with the first two promises I have made before I was able to keep those promises. Basta guys, lagi nyong tatandaan during the competition kung kelangan ko kayo saluhin sa pool, i won't hestitate to jump after you. Ganyan ko kayo ka-love...Thank you guys for making my training days bearable and worth it. Sorry kung minsan nag cacancel ako ng trainings pero i do hope maintindihan niyo na your safety comes first, pangalawa ang championship sa akin. Sorry din if ever may nasaktan ako sainyo, i promise you hindi ko intention yun. Love you guys! I'm proud of you!!!!

hot gym+stupid schedule=migraine

A while ago...well more on like yesterday, we (as in the whole st. paul community) watched this cultural show. The performers were good but i didn't really appreciate the show because of the following reasons:
first reason: GRABE ang init! as in super...its like being baked in the oven. When I think about my st. scho days, I am usually one of those people who'd complain about the gym being hot...scholasticans, guess what!? may mas mainit pa na gym and that's st paul qc's gym!!!! super!!!!
second reason: our schedule for the day was super sabog. Yesterday it was announced that it will be shortened period. Tapos biglang binawi..everyone who watched the 1-2 o clock show will resume regular classes after the show. Tapos binago nanaman ulit..which is which!?
third reason: I developed a major migraine...because of the heat and then biglang air con, my head hurts badly. I felt like I was going to faint if I didn't get the heck out of that gym. Even Ms. Jo took pity on me when she saw me going out of the gym fanning and wiping away perspiration...i heard her tell manong someone: "hindi niya sigyro kinaya init at kelangan niya lumabas" well, it was true! partly, because I went to the cafeteria to buy ice cold drink to ward off the feeling of faintness...

Lesson learned? well yes, somehow, I learned a few things from the show. One of them is that Philippines is a rich country..not just in agriculture and tourist spots and definitely not money...but we are rich in colorful and imaginative culture. We have a lot of dances, festivals and such that are rarely found in other countries. Yes, although Philippines is a third world country (as they say) I still love it to bits.

blogtasan

so i was doing this "blogtasan" thing kanina sa school. Honestly, I am still pissed off about it. People might think that its not really a big deal...but if you were in my place what would you think?

For the whole weekend, everytime this blogtasan comes up my blood gets boiling. I am irritated and I felt violated of my own right to choose whether or not I am joining this competition. First, our organization president didn't ask me if I wanted to join. She just placed my name and a few days before the competition, I got surprised that I am in this competition. Damn it! I have many things to worry about. What's so frustrating about it is that the competition day collides with my swimming trainings. The org president didn't even bother asking kung may naka schedule ako na activities for that day. She knows very well that there are trainings every Mondays. The second most frustrating is that the whole block knows that I have a hard time expressing myself in Filipino and she signed me up for a competition that clearly yells "FILIPINO LANGUAGE MUST BE USED TO EXPRESS YOUR THOUGHTS" ARGH!!! its not like im a transferee or something that she didn't know about this minor detail about me.

Maybe the reason why she placed me in this competition is because when it comes to issues, I am very much opinionated and I think deeply about these things. But come on, those subjects are in ENGLISH...and sabihin natin na Filipino subject siya, it is something that I would easily understand and I don't need to ask around what's this and what's that?

Nakakafrustrate grabe. I was so helpless. I was to choose between this blogtasan or the swimming training. In the end, I chose the blogtasan because poor Myrene will be left alone if I don't show up. Pero I wans't able to concentrate on the competition because I was worried about my team. I know Mel is there and I trust her with the team...but hey, I am the team captain so I guess its normal that I get worried about them. Mel is still trying the ropes on the whole "Jump after ____ because pinupulikat siya" That's my whole worry!!! I know Mel will do her best but if something happens ako ang lagot because I am the team captain, I called for the training and I myself wasn't even there. Damn this whole situation.

I just hope this would not happen again....